I completed the 10k this morning. I'd like to say I ran it, but I didn't. I ran about 7 minutes total and walked the remainder. It took 1 hour and 43 minutes total. That's an average of 3.6 mph. I actually finished the first half in one minute less than I ran the 5k back in September... mostly walking.
I realized a couple of things during my time alone to reflect on things. The first and main thing, I am not a runner. Sure, I can run, and I can continue to push myself into running more, but I don't enjoy it. I enjoy accomplishments. Running programs, running races, those are accomplishments I enjoy, not the actual running.
The other, is that I'm angry with myself. I let myself slide in my goals, in my journey in the past 5 months. I've roughly maintained the same weight, I gained about 15 pounds since my lightest when I did the 5k. I cried around mile 3, not from physical pain, but mental, emotional pain. I am the only one who can right my wrong. And I will. I vowed, then and there, that I would continue on journey and I will succeed.
I WILL DO IT.